3.04.2012

Interdepence

I was texting with a friend yesterday and we were talking about the need for and benefits of writing.  It can help you out of a "funk".  It can be a self-discovery process.  It can record your own personal history.  I sorta miss that part of me that shared her heart mainly through words instead of pictures.  Sooo, in an effort to recapture that piece of me and in response to a friend's challenge-  I write.  (Hope to see an update soon on your blog Traci!).

Chad shared with me something he'd read from "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People".  The gist- when we're young, we're dependent on our parents and the goal is to mature from dependence to independence.  Then later in life, the next level of development is to move from independence to interdependence.

With that in mind, a few weeks back Chad and me went dancing for our date.  I'm not much of a dancer, but it was a lot of fun.  It was a ballroom dance.  We were the youngest couple there...and very under dressed.  Lucky for me, Chad knows various dance steps, so I could just sorta follow his lead.

Halfway through the date, Chad helped me realize that I wasn't doing my part as a dance partner.  He showed me how I needed to be giving a little more resistance to his hand.  It was so much easier to just sorta hold his hand and let him lead the way.  I thought about the implications that this could have in our marriage.  I thought about interdependence.  He needs me to push back.  He can't do all the leading and I merely follow, like I had been doing in our dancing.  Likewise, I can't lead him.  I have to do my part and give a little.  Dancing takes two independent people doing their part, yet inter depending on the other.  A sort of synergistic creation.  Needless to say, that date has caused me to reflect on how I can "push back" and bring something more to our marriage.

...and because I think visuals are always nice even if they're just some low quality iphone pictures- the dance floor and live band.

ballrm dance

1 comment :

  1. I'm proud of you Meesh. I love your words. I love that you went dancing. My Grandpa would ballroom dance with us all the time growing up. He always said, "Resist me, damn it." Those words were said over the pulpit at his funeral. :)

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